Well, here we are. The year two thousand. The notorious Y2K. And we've survived. No computer meltdowns. No Armageddon. No more Chicken Littles bemoaning the end of the world. Now that all the hoopla's over, it's just another year. The new century feels remarkably identical to the last. And the new millenium -- It feels like nothing at all.I remember as a kid, maybe nine years old, when I first realized the year two thousand was approaching. I did a quick calculation on my Peechee folder. I figured I'd turn forty the year the century arrived. Now that I stand on that cusp of forty, near the peaking mid-point of my life, I still feel like that nine-year-old kid: full of awe and wonder at the world.As a kid, you, like me, might also have imagined the magnificence of a new millenium. I looked forward to that magic moment when those three final nines on the cosmic odometer yielded at midnight to a row of fresh zeroes. Since then, time has flown like a Frisbee.I remember New Years Eve, 1969 -- bicycling down elm-lined streets, riding my banana-seat- sissy-bar Schwinn, anticipating the sentimental onslaught of the 70s.I remember New Years Eve, 1979 -- driving my VW through a warm tropical rain, rain splashing my windshield, rain seeping in through my leaky convertible top, frizzing out my curly- headed all-natural "fro."I remember New Years Eve, 1989 -- lying in bed in some cheap motel, sneezing, wheezing, sick with the flu; my friends down the highway, drunk with joy welcoming the 90s with a crowd of thousands. Snow, like confetti, falling on Lake Tahoe.For New Years Eve, 1999, I prepared to do nothing by sit in my room, to burn a single candle, a stick of jasmine incense, to meditate on the meaning of life as the world around me crashed to a cataclysmic halt.Today, we are fortunate and priviledged to have survived the turn of the century. Years from now, when the currently unborn become incurably inquisitive, they will ask us to recall the turn of this millenium, to share our memories of that momentous occasion.Let's not tell them how we all freaked out. Let's not mention how paranoid we were, how we stocked up on water, how we stashed our cash, how we waited for the aliens to carry us home. Let's not mention that. Let's forget about our fears of terrorist attacks, our doomsday religious ferver. Instead, let's suggest they look forward, not backward.If the past is truly prologue, let us then endow our future generations with the benefit of our 20th century hindsight. Let's share with them the lessons of all past millenia. So consider, if you will, these twenty-one suggestions for success in the 21st century:Trust Yourself. In the long run, most people won't. Don't follow the crowd.Be On Time. Those who show up late may think they're important, but they're the only ones who do.Plan Ahead. Remember: No one plans to fail; they simply fail to plan.Slow Down. After all, it's better to journey than to arrive.Don't Argue. When others are wrong, just smile and nod. It's enough to know you're right.Save Your Money. Better to have a jar full of coins than a closet full of junk.Be Nice to Children. Eventually, they all grow up. You do not want them exacting revenge.Exercise Your Right to Vote. One afternoon of inconvenience is far better than four long years of George W. Bush.Tip Big. What goes around, comes around.Play Fair. Even if you're the best, it often pays to let the other guy win.Clean Your Room. A messy desk may be the sign of an organized mind, but a messy room is the sign of a slob.Tie Your Shoes. Others will always try tripping you up. No sense helping them out.When in Doubt, Listen. Better to keep your mouth shut and let others think you're stupid than open your mouth and let them know for sure.Do Not Rely on Spellcheck. Nobody's perfect. Not even Bill Gates.Always Say Thank You. Even to those who don't deserve it.Be Prepared. It's a good motto. Scout's honor.Share Your Stuff. Never forget: It's just stuff.Don't Give Up Hope. At some point, hope may be all you have.Cover Your Mouth When You Sneeze. Please!Be Real. No one will ever know the real you if you're too busy trying to be someone Don't Worry. Even when the proverbial doo-doo hits the fan, the breeze still blows.We all deserve a pat on the back for having made it this far. Let's not now forget: The best is yet to come.
